Chapter 4: North Park and the Russian Giant

The very next night, Stacey and I put our game faces on and hit up the bar scene in a new area of San Diego called North Park, which is delightfully Indie-chic. Converse sneakers and side-swept bangs flock to North Park the way droolosity and rock-hardness flock to Matthew McConaughey’s abs.

While out in NP, I met an uberly tall, string bean skinny, Russian, biochemist named Ilya. Over the next couple of weeks I went out with Ilya four times. Each of our outings was entertaining and I always had a reasonably good time. But the thing was, in spite of being a nice, sweet, decent human being - Ilya was a nice, sweet, decent human being…yawn, and I liked Marc more. Also, not to totally doggy paddle around in the shallow end of the pool, but Ilya was a bit on the eye spam-ish side and I couldn’t help cringing a little every time he went in for a lip lock.

Anyways, at the end of date numero four, Ilya was clearly looking for a carnal goody bag. Instead, however, he got to sit on the opposing end of my Salvation Army couch and work out celebrity crossword puzzles…sexy right? Ilya apparently didn’t think so. As he moved in for a make-out, I halted him with 4 across: 11 letter movie title starring Ryan Reynolds and Amy Smart (Just Friends). He left shortly afterwards, never to be heard from again.

Oh well!